Phase 2 (II)

forgot to add that the separation anxiety peaks at this phase too.. she wants me to do everything... can't be out of her sight.. u know the works :(

I was also reminded in school that this phase includes rebelling aka "not listening to the word NO".. the minute you say NO, she cries if not continue doing it and insists on doing which is worse.

Think we are suffering from burnout... DD T says he can see my face damn "gek sim", but we both don't have a answer to this problem. I mean we can always throw her in a childcare or a nanny or a helper, these of course will be the easy way out.... take her in the evening and play a little then put her to sleep and we carry on with life. How easy this sounds, damn tempting I tell you!

Before our trip to KL, was telling DD T about me wanting a holiday as I needed to recharge and kinda miss europe too. So he told me to chose the country that I want to go and make arrangements... so I got all excited kinda miss my London duck rice, my Paris desserts, my Italy sightseeing. Even felt like doing a Spain trip...

but after the KL trip I flipped lar... totally can't see myself stuck in a plane for 13 hours with her and having to deal with all this. It was only a 40 mins flight! It didn't help that KL was damn HOT!

How to recharge? I can go to a children friendly place but we don't do beaches (just preference) , can't do Japan as we are going during CNY, don't want Australia... 3 days ago, we were asked to go Canada by DD T's customer.. damn bloody tempting, but HOW TO FLY 24 HRs?? sigh sigh sigh... we both need to recharge ourselves before thinking of having another child but tired oh so tired. Can't help that we have no heart not to bring her... sianz alot..

Phase 2

remember the screaming phase? its back and worse....

we are quite prepared for the screaming, I mean been there done that, just tahan and it will pass... now is stomping of the tiny feets, pulling the clothes/hands to follow HER, "talk to my hand".

I explain the situation to her teacher Lin about her biting thingy, apparently biting is the most mild... children are known to beat, slap, kick, fight... gosh *sweats*, I read alot in detail and it seems that biting is their way of trying to communicate themselves. Its the most apparent to toddlers who are trying to vocalize themselves but is unable to do so. This biting will stop once the child starts talking (trust me I'm praying real hard). Lin explained that Bb[V] has a high EQ with makes it difficult to accept her lack of talking skills. The fact that she is high EQ, we have to pre empt her behaviour way before her peers. We have to accept that we do not have a difficult child just because her friends haven't gone through it... just that she has the problems months before them. I do sometimes look at her friends and see the issues that we faced and am glad I had it oredi, but I guess issues like this are ongoing coz I have a new one now *boo hoos*

The last round, she was screaming about everything that didn't go her way. She didn't understand the concept of time: eg she screamed when it was time to leave the pool, leave the playground, walked out of the toy shops. The teachers taught me to give her instructions on time "3 more minutes Victoria, 1 more minute Victoria" It worked and she stopped her crying. From here she understood that I wasn't abruptly stopping her games or the taking the things she loved.

They warned me about the sharing concept... its here this time round. Children will never understand why they have to share, coz they have the toy means its theirs. By "sharing" to them means; YOU ARE TAKING IT AWAY AND IT WILL NEVER COME BACK. (actually true lar...lol) So they fight with the parent or their friends. They fall in and out of this phase till 3-4 years old, it doesn't mean that the child looks okie today and so he is over the phase... so as parents we must constantly remind them about it. This proves to be rather tough this time as it seems that she is bullying her peers whens she snatches the toys or refuse to share.

Now that she is walking, she hates her beco carrier and her stroller (was never her fav anyway). She insists on walking, carrying, walking and carrying! Damn difficult, trust me.. It totally drains us. Doesn't help that when she walks in a crowded place and goes round touching ppl's legs, bottoms. Or that she goes to a shop and touches EVERYTHING. Then when you correct her, she shakes her head or makes some noise that gets the attention of the people around.

I'm quite banning her from her friends until this is over and becomes the sweet girl (sometimes) again. DD T says this are all inevitable, ya i know.. but she is better of going out with me alone or with my girlies as the only baby. Its really not easy as a mother and go through the amount of sorries and explanation ...I just have to put a smile through my embarrassment and remind myself that its just motherhood.

sick... me

today is the 7th day..

I finally decided to open the lappie... woke up today feeling way better than the last few... did a shower and bam! the sick feeling came back again.. sigh ...Just when I thought I can go meet up with my girlies for a SATC movie or something...

I haven't never been so sick for a long time.. while in KL I kept popping Panadol extra to keep me going but the bloody weather made it real worse... came back Sin and popped some over the counter meds prescribed by my mil (she the pharmacist) and finally yesterday to the doctors' just outside the in laws... after 2 years of no illness, I realized I didn't have free medical anymore and I didn't have the energy to drive to Bishan for my good old family Dr- the one I go to when I was a wee one.

been slipping in and out slumberland the last few days... the head hurts and its groggy most of the time. Thank goodness for the in laws wh0 have been looking after BB [V] while I tuck myself in bed upstairs away from all the ruckus ...

pampering me

so since I stopped Breast feeding....

I was able to be ME... something I didn't get to do since May 2008...

Did henna once while bF-ing and another round 2 weeks ago but realized it wasn't oomphz enough... so I highlighted my hair today... am pleased with the results.

I realized I'm very pro natural now, maybe coz of the pregnancy and Bf-ing ... I look for things organic, hypo allergenic... The minute I knew that Mary Kay was non comedogenic, meant for sensitive skins and not tested on animals.. I bought the whole range....

Like today I wanted a nice hair colour but refused and decided on highlighting as it doesn't affect my scalp .. blah blah blah

U know today, my mum called and told me that my 9+ yrs old niece had her 1st period yesterday.. it got me worried as in 8 years time its going to be V's time and I have 8 years to teach her about sex education... then I wondered if I had a boy, its 6 years to educate as I think cock stands earlier right or was it wet dream 1st? hmmm.... whatever it is think its worse having a boy as the responsibility is way heavier as you got to teach them not to scratch balls or flash their torch around or that anal sex is NOT the way to go! (that is if the parents are okie with another son - pun intended)

So my mom says its becoz my niece like to eat chicken rice and that chicken has hormones etc .. u get the gist... so I have to be mindful of what BB [V] eats to prevent expediting of young raging hormones issues! So its natural once again....

Back to topic.. me is changing my warerobe as I have had enough of my frumpy 2 piece clothes due to the easy retrieval of my boobs then ... so must "piao liang" abit... I have grown to detest shopping as I DO NOT HAVE THE TIME TO WINDOW SHOP! *sigh.. what was my favourite past time has now become a chore. Resorting to online shopping can only allow you to dress the same as you are coz you will only buy back similar design as they were "safe" ..

So now I can customize your skincare and makeup coz of my new found interest in MK... I however need

1) a personal shopper- one that understands my body type and can portfolio my outfits (aka includes shoes, accessories, hair style) basically customize my look for the month or season...

2) hair products - I need someone who can sell me good hair products.. I totally hate the idea of the salon pushing their products to me so that they can pay rent. My hair is lacklustre... and I DO NOT HAVE THE TIME TO SIT IN THE SALON 3 HOURS EACH TIME !

so my dear friends... you know my needs.. help me like how I have helped you.. pls har not exorbitant prices

tyvm

the drama starts

her premolars are out all 4...

so it was easy peasy .. everybody says damn rough etc etc but ours was damn smooth...

then!!! wa piangs eh.. last 2 days was crappy.. the drama queen is in full action, she gave the "talk to my hand", "don't you dare disturb face", n her infamous screams.... We thought is just crankiness but nope.. today she bit Ern's finger and pull her hair coz things didn't go her way and Ern happen to be there disturbing her.. *sigh

I came back to the Ng's and grumbled at the terrible behaviour and she got reprimanded... sat there, pout and gave the "talk to my hand" ... We came here coz we had a customer down and Grandpa Ng wanted us to be around to have dinner with them.. Even Grandma Ng and Aunty Nita can't stand her nonsense today and she was shouted at many times.

so pre molars didn't affect her.. the incisors are the one playing punk! darn darn darn

I hate it especially when you ask people "have u gone through this?" and the reply is always "no leh, mine was smooth sailing.. or never had that... or hmm got meh..." F irritaing! Its either these people have selective amnesia or is a person in absolute denial....

I however am proud to say "my child is full of shit"

Wavehouse Sentosa

we went for a swim at aquaducks.... I suggested that we come here as I got hooked coming here... I like the feeling of this place and it made me feel like I was overseas.. giving that relax feel that i so miss... it helped that my friend was working there as the GM and I get to catch up on old times...

I was just there the day before having champagne and swore to bring DD T and BB V there.

the kiddos in their cabana.. checking out the place
getting to know her surroundings...
"bio-ing" the lifeguard! when we left at 5pm, she was blowing kisses at him and he catching them. .. such a heart throb
only when you are a mummy that knows how to relax, you groom a child that is the same... look at her sleeping in the cabana .. looks like she is in Maldives or something right!


my old clubbing kaki .. my "son" coz he calls me Mama lol... can't imagine those days when he was the guy I went to for alcohol in velvet (yes i was a damn bloody alco +clubber..) 10 years forward and we still meet up though now its in the day with the sun n sea...

been lazy

been reading, surfing, watching shows online, meeting friends... its been a lazy May

Just one of those weeks I don't feel like writing or sorting the photos in the camera... btw just found my camera which has been missing for weeks, was in V's little handbag *bleah...

Spent the last one week, going everywhere! shopping, lunching, swimming, suntanning, boozing... basically chilling out... great time to recharge, find directions in my life, getting back an identity and rediscovering me-self.

So... I was suppose to go back to work, went for interview etc.. then when it was time to decide, I backed out. I thought back about what I wrote in my blog during my birthday and realized that by me going back flying isn't what I want as a mother now. So I sat down with DD T and spoke about it.. my hb has always been very supportive in whatever I do.. the day I said I wanted to go; he said okie and supported me .. and now with a new decision he still supported me. *sweets

I guess at that time when I submitted my request to go back was when BB [V] was already one, then there was the screaming phrase and the Dr's advice to detach.. I somehow wanted to feel wanted and useful again. Of course going back to my old job was the easiest way, earning back my 60-70k annum was also very ideal. But when everything was about settled, I had cold feet... coz I spoke to myself this time and realized that how many women have a luxury to look after a child and not work? By me having so much money, am I going to be happy? Is this what I want?

I see the other mummies getting upset with the lack of time with their children... though sometimes I know that I do not appreciate this precious time with BB [V] especially those days she does things that gets me all upset.. I still think that I am damn bloody F lucky to be in my position! Yes there were times when I feel that money is tight; (pls consider the fact that I have overflowing cash in the past) but I think; how bad is it that I do have a "Tai Tai" lifestyle with a luxury car to drive, a credit card to sign. I suppose the more you compare, the worse it sucks.

As I was all down and was not able to fiqure out my life 1 month ago..

I did mention that about the skincare that my gf recommended; Mary Kay... I did join them to get discounts for my new range of skincare that I wanted to get for my toiletries bag for my flying. I bought a anti-aging range and the makeups; my green shadows, red lipticks etc.. whahah (don't koe what to do with it now)

My girlfriend suggested that I should go for a ESRS (essential steps to reach success) course and since I was free and I went... in that class I learnt so much about this lady that founded this company 47 years ago and saw her vision that she had for the women in her life. How she created a company to reach women and enrich them...

This was the words that made me changed my mind....

Words of wisdom from Mary Kay Ash: "God first, Family second, Career third" if you know your priorities in life, they will all fall in place.

The playhouse

there is nice playhouse in Rochester park.. so we went for a lunch date with the kiddos

I like it lots as it all new n not crowded.. noting its only 3 weeks. They have everything there and me n ern's mummy like the idea that we can throw them around while we chill. But we still have to be there as they only allow kiddos to be 18 months before they can stay in unsupervised though there is a gal working there to "see water".. Foods are a little limited but I believe its going to improve. Will go there again soon.. but once it gets crowed, then too bad.

they have boxes of dress up costumes which is why BB[V] has her wings, some cute tent house which she was so engrossed in (me wanna buy!), ball pit, slide, craft tables, kitchenette, padded flooring and AIRCON... keke really not too bad..

was there and happen to see one of old party kaki for China Jump and she was working there... the boss is simon lim - the former madam wong's owner.. (for those not in my era .. pls pardon hor... ) I think its a damn great idea, the playhouse btw has Xbox for the older kiddos one the 2nd floor.. think DD T will enjoy himself there LOL...

7 rochester park.. 1 hr $6

water baby

saw this in a mummy's blog and was so determined to buy it!

It was like real hot right? doesn't help that she was sick 2 weeks ago and was not able to go for her regular dips in water... so I finally took it out last week and it damn damn fun! (ps note its alot of water keke) good for a hot day without me getting wet.. I like

Vain!!

I think my daughter starts young....

while we were shopping in Takashimaya... she stopped at accessorize and did her own shopping

well.. she won! I though it will be one of those things that she will discard after she reached home.. but I was wrong

can pose some more... the bracelet didn't sit well on her wrist and so it became her anklet.. pls note that she made me take out her $80 anklet the last time! crappy lar this gal...

and she wears everything to sleep.. here is she at the grands preparing for her sleep time.. took her alice band and pose... my hippie ah lian... oh she got her toe nails painted by aunty nita! *faints

15 months

I stopped breastfeeding....

we both are happy! Guess its because I get to be Florinda and she forgets that she needs comfort sucking. Though I miss it hellava lots but I guess I won't be stopping at one child so there will be chances. But I'm damn bloody proud that I lasted this long!

so what's up with my gal? Ever so drama, ever so demanding, ever so entertaining, ever so a joker... I tell you, the many patterns that she has!

1) I realized BB[V] don't like cartoons.. weird right? All her friends like Mickey mouse clubhouse, I mean who don't like Mickey mouse.. not her lar.. she walks away when its showing on TV. In fact any cartoon except maybe adverts like Spongebob coz maybe he is as loud as her? She only watches shows that involves in people or puppets... there must be facial expressions!! and of course music... if you read about the difference between girls and boys .. this is one of the most distinct difference as girls are into details like facial expressions and little things which makes them like dolls and toys. While boys see things in general like cars and trucks! I found this to be very apparent for BB[V] as since young she always look at people's face and analyze... even her teacher Lin can comment on how she stands in class and stares at the adults faces

Yes BB[V] has freaking alot of stuffies! doesn't help that DD and the grands buy her 1 soft toy everytime they go out.. sigh.. coz MM has sinus and don't quite like the dust the creatures attract.

she grows older, the toys gets bigger.

see can pose somemore!

Doesn't help that she wants a toy every where she goes. one of her fav.. Paul Frank

Grandma Tay was trying to tell her to go to sleep by making the toys go to sleep... AND SHE SLEPT LAR!!! wahaha.. I found it so funny!

2) So there was this one day at the NGs.. Her godma invited her girlies for a burger party and of course we stayed over after dinner as we too stuffed to go home. The girlies were trying to create this shooter that one of gals had when she was in Zouk, "Vodka Sourplum shooter"... So they had the works, Vodka, shaker, ice, sourplum etc, tried many times to create the drink but of course flopped (u think so easy meh)

But the funny part was that she was crying so hard as she wanted to join them which I did bring her to the dining table.. and she wanted to drink lar! whatever they were drinking!!!!! In the end...

I had to pour her milk into the shot glass!!! now you tell me, my daughter is full of shit right!!!

3) She is expression lots...

4) BB[V] has started to hug everyone... she will come to us and give hugs very freely... from the back or hug the leg... and also the dogs... only Fluffy allows it and is nonchalant about the many hugz.. Bam Bam however is not very happy at the constant hugging...

really sucks up all my energy... (continue..)